BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
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I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
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Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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