My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
