I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
