he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
True college students do jello shots in the library
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
