WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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