youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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