Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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