remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
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The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
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You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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