i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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