She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I want her autograph on my taint
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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