you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
