Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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