Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
