He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize