How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
