Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
and you fell through a lawn chair
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
