Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
We have so much sex to catch up on
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
