That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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