Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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