the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
