No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
