The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize