Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
