Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
