dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Randomize
