But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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