My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
