absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
