dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize