All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
