we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It was like giving head to a cactus.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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