She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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