so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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