Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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