My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
