oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
