Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
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We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
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I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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