Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize