brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
And then he peed in my hair
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