Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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