Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
