im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
I'm going back tonight
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
19 Transgender People Reveal The First Sign That They Were Trans
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet