Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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