oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
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