Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
