Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
