he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
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