Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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