I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
