Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize