new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
he had hair everywhere except his balls
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
